Some like it hot. They’re crazy

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Thereís nothing funny about 100+ degrees ó unless youíre the kind who laughs at the poor sucker who leans unwittingly against his car in the parking lot.

Itís a scientific fact that some folks turn surly when the thermometer gets bubbly. Itís as if the heat evaporates their patience. You donít want to be directly ahead of these hotheads in traffic. You donít want to be sitting next to them at the bar. And you sure as heck donít want to end your day by telling them, ďGoodnight, dear.Ē

But back to our problem. Forecasts are calling for high temps in the Coeur díAlene area Thursday of 103, which is two degrees short of the Aug. 9 record set in 1980 but a long, long way from comfortable.

There are just two things you can do, really:

1. Get takeout for dinner.

2. Try to laugh.

We canít help you with No. 1, but hereís a down payment on No. 2: Ten decent ďHow hot is it?Ē jokes we rounded up on ye olde internet.

• Itís so hot, birds are wearing oven mitts to pull worms from the ground.

• Itís so hot, the Statue of Liberty has been asked to please lower her arm.

• Itís so hot, people are setting their houses on fire so they can cool off.

• Itís so hot, Jehovahís Witnesses are telemarketing.

• Itís so hot, I got condensation on my rear sitting on the toilet.

• Itís so hot, two trees are fighting over every dog.

• Itís so hot, chickens are laying hard-boiled eggs.

• Itís so hot, they installed a fan in the debt ceiling.

• Itís so hot, the catfish are already fried when you catch Ďem.

And:

• Itís so hot, no shirt, no pants ó no problem!

Hereís hoping your air conditioner doesnít have a wicked sense of humor.

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